Planning my Entire Life is Stressful

For a while now I’ve been planning my life out. Over and over again. Always backspacing and thinking of some hypothetical improvement that I cling to for a little while but eventually falls away and is replaced by something else.

Some of the many variations of my “life plan” have included psychiatry, veterinary medicine, animal physical therapy, actuarial science, molecular biology, editorial writing, leading women’s ministry, and public speaking. As you can see, there’s quite a wide variety of options that I have cluttering my mind.

Along with these choices, there’s also which college to attend, another looming decision to make. I just got back from a trip to Cedarville University in Ohio, a place that I could definitely see myself living for the next season of my life. The problem is, there’s a million other colleges that I haven’t seen, and I can fall into worry if I’m not careful.

All of these decisions that we as teenagers have to make for the rest of our lives are so stressful and confusing. I’m still not sure what I want to do, and I worry that I might never have some magical feeling of peace and contentment as I discover my dream career… but that’s okay. It’s wishful thinking to think it would come that easily.

These decisions are still far away and God’s still got a lot of work to do in me by developing my passions and strengths. I know that He will lead me as long as I keep my eyes fixed on Him, and even if He doesn’t give a clear direction for my calling, I’ll find something that I’m good at and will support me and serve Him there, as He can be served within any vocation that doesn’t contradict His Word.

Believe me, writing that and even believing that doesn’t make me feel any better about the unknown ahead of me, but it’s still truth that needs to be spoken whether it changes the way I feel or not. Surely His Word doesn’t return void and will change me from the inside out.

So, for every teenager or even any adult who might be looking ahead into the unknown, trust and obey. There’s no other way to be happy in Jesus and to remain within His will.

 

Still overcoming,

Hannah